FLASHBACK WEEKEND 2005

Rejects and Rubber Chickens

by Dr. Abner Mality

Photos by Mort Poisson and Dr. Mality



Once a year, freaks and misfits from all around the Midwest descend upon the Chicago area to worship their own. This is the annual Flashback Weekend, devoted to horror, science fiction and underground culture. And naturally, it's a place where I, Dr. Abner Mality, feel very much at home.

This year's line-up of celebrity ghouls was one I couldn't miss. In honor of the just released Rob Zombie film "The Devil's Rejects", cast members Sid Haig, Bill Moseley and Matt Mcgrory reunited to celebrate the grisly ode to serial killers. Sinister Michael Berryman of "The Hills Have Eyes" fame was here. To remember the 25th anniversary of the John Carpenter film "The Fog" we had appearances by Adrienne Barbeau, Charles Cyphers, Tom Atkins and Nancy Loomis. And to cap it all off, there was a rare visit from the king of horror hosts and one of my personal heroes, the Son of Svengoolie!

Now how could I pass this one up!

There's no way I could so I grabbed fellow Wormwood compatriot the mysterious Mort Poisson and made my merry way to the Crowne Plaza O'Hare located in the heart of the teeming hell that is the Rosement Airport district. Mort kindly agreed to transport the Good Doctor and the first nerve-wracking horror we ran into was suburban Chicago traffic, which put our lives in peril at several points. The exit we needed to take was basically reduced to rubble so I was forced to ask directions from a gas station attendant who resembled Cook in "Texas Chainsaw Massacre". After a couple of stomach-churning switchbacks and an ascent to the top of a parking deck that almost required oxygen, we were finally at our destination and made our way to the fun and frenzy of Flashback Weekend.

First panel Q & A we sat in on featured Camille Keaton from "I Spit On Your Grave", one of the legendary shockers of the 70's drive-in heyday. Ms. Keaton has weathered the years pretty well and her breathy, feminine voice with its perfect diction still sets my heart aflutter. Big problem during her Q&A...and throughout most of them as a whole...was that you could not hear the questions being asked by the audience. This led to a "guessing game" when the answers came. Convention co-host Steve Prokopy was little help. He should have repeated the questions for all to hear...something his more energetic partner Nick DiVirgilio from WGN Radio did for "The Fog" panel.

Things heated up with the "Devil's Rejects" panel Q & A up next, featuring Wormwood pal Sid Haig, Captain Spaulding himself, as well as Bill Moseley and towering Matt McGrory, who played the grotesque "Tiny" Firefly. McGrory was in pretty bad shape, confined to a wheelchair, but seemed chipper enough, booming out answers to questions in a voice reminiscent of the late Andre the Giant.(It is with sorrow that I report Mr. McGrory died just a few days after the convention. Ironically, his last role was playing Andre in a movie about his life. R.I.P.--Dr. Mality) It's obvious that the Devils Reject's cast members have a strong camaraderie and a good sense of humor. When someone from the crowd asked why Karen Black did not appear in the new movie, Sid held up his hand and made a motion like counting money. "Creative differences," he said. "LOTS of creative differences!". That brought a chuckle from the crowd.

It was also pretty obvious that these fellows also have a lot of respect for Rob Zombie, the director of "Devil's Rejects". Moseley related how he had a lot of difficulty doing a harsh scene involving torture of a female victim. He told Zombie that he felt "bummed out by the scene", to which Zombie replied, "Good. You're supposed to if this is gonna look real." Moseley has a wry sense of humor and meshed really well with the outspoken and wise-cracking Haig. When asked if he thought Zombie's films were the equivalent of gritty drive-in flicks and a solution to modern teenybopper horror, Sid's answer was strident and heart-felt: "You know, CGI and remakes are for people with no guts and no imagination!"

Mort and I next made our way to the dealer's room to see what was going down there. They really ought to call these areas "temptation rooms" because it is the land of 1000 and 1 temptations for lovers of horror and weirdness such as myself. Wherever you looked, someone was hawking rare tapes and DVD's of hard to find exploitation masterpieces. There were cool posters and T-shirts galore, including an original "Taxi Driver" poster that was going for $400.00 but which Mort told me could command as much as $1000.00. Mort himself almost flipped when I found a copy of "Sweet Movie", the obscure and infamous counter-culture film featuring John Vernon urinating on people with a gold-plated penis! There were also a selection of gruesome dolls, Polish porno slasher movies and back issues of hard to find monster mags.

Many booths were manned by convention guests, who were busy signing autographs and chatting. I managed to hook up with Michael Berryman of "The Hills Have Eyes" fame, who also has a part in "The Devil's Rejects". For a guy who looks like he might cook and eat your five year old niece with no problems, Mr. Berryman is a fabulously nice guy who was extremely pleasant to talk to and who signed memorabilia for hours on end with no tiring. Look for a Wormwood interview with Mr. Berryman very soon!

Next I managed to get an autographed poster from Captain Spaulding, Sid Haig. The line to see Sid and his "Devil's Rejects" cohorts was long indeed. It was a genuine pleasure getting to shake the hand and speak to the man I chatted with over the internet for Wormwood Chronicles. When I mentioned that I recently screened Mr. Haig's first movie "Spider Baby" for Wormwood Movie NIght, he lit right up. If the line to meet him hadn't been so long, I would have loved to chew the fat with this legend longer. Thanks also to his very kind publicist, Suzie Oberg, who has helped me in the past.

We were both impressed by how sharp and vivacious Adrienne Barbeau was in her solo Q & A session. She was obviously not a horror "nut", but nevertheless enjoyed answering questions from the audience, which ranged in subject matter from her old comedy hit "Maude" to her stint on the recently cancelled HBO show "Carnivale" to her work in genre classics like "Escape From New York", "Swamp Thing" and "The Fog". We would see more of her later.

As a total contrast to Adrienne's cheery professionalism, we sat in next on a panel discussing the new underground movie "Chaos". For those who don't know, this is basically a remake of "Last House on the Left", only, as producer Stephen Jay Bernholm was fond of telling us, "much more brutal and intense". Bernholm is a Harvard-trained lawyer and he came across just as arrogant as you'd expect one to be. "We've had at least 25 people at every screening of "Chaos" get up and leave before the first half hour is done," chortled Bernholm. "I'm rather proud of that fact." He continued: "Really, "Last House on the Left" is dated and slow. "Chaos" is much more up to date and what people want to see."

Mort whispered to me, "Isn't this guy an arrogant prick?". Yes, because he is, in fact, an arrogant prick. What's so challenging about grossing people out and chasing them away from your movie? I would say it's as easy as rolling off a log. It's the same as this Japanese crap that features women being dissected and gutted in slow motion with no plot. What does it prove, other than the fact that you can do it? Where is the imagination and atmosphere?

Bernholm was accompanied by "Chaos" director David DeFalco, who looked like he just came from a tryout for WWE Smackdown with his muscled physique and oddball hairdo. To his credit, DeFalco did not come across as full of himself as Bernholm and admitted "Last House is one of my favorite movies". But he,too, sees "Chaos" as being superior. Well, as Mort also noted, it takes a hell of a lot more balls to release "Last House on the Left" in 1975 than it does to release "Chaos" in 2005.

I have yet to see "The Devil's Rejects" but feel that this movie is also probably full of brute cruelty and crude horror. But the cast and the creative process give it something that "Chaos" lacks: respectability.

Truth to tell, the Doctor loves his sleazy drive-in classics, but I feel most at home in the world of classic monsters, giant bugs and alien invaders. The sort of world that guys like Son of Svengoolie rule. More about Sven in a little bit...

One guy I didn't see all day was the guest of honor, the illustrious Bruce Campbell. Bruce has now developed into such a genuine cult phenomena that he is on a different plane than most of the other guests at Flashback Weekend. Bruce drew a HUGE line of admirers hoping the great man would sign their memorabilia, which more often than not was a copy of Campbell's latest book, "Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way". Talk about an ego, haha! Wish I could have got some of Bruce's advice, but you can't win 'em all...

As a kind of reverse reaction to the grimness and pomposity of the "Chaos" panel, we next celebrated the 25th anniversary of John Carpenter's "The Fog" with a star-studded Q & A session that featured Tom Atkins, Adrienne Barbeau, Charles Cyphers and Nancy Loomis. This was a cheerful bunch, with Atkins in particular seeming to be very jovial and loose. Cyphers didn't say all that much but spent most of the time smiling and laughing. Someone in the crowd got Nancy Loomis to sing a bit from her song "Hey Paul", which got some applause. These folks were professional actors who were happy to reminisce about the past, but being in "The Fog" was primarily a job for them, not some sort of crusade to change the world of horror. I'd drink a beer wtih Tom Atkins any night.

What's unnerving is that "The Fog" is now considered an "old" horror movie by many. To me, it is still new! I consider Universal and Hammer to be "old" horror...and very dear horror,too, by the way.

Mr. Rich Koz understands the appeal of this classic horror. Never heard of Rich Koz? Then perhaps you've heard of his more infamous alter ego...the Son of Svengoolie.

I remember very well when Son of Sven debuted on Chicago TV. It was 1979, the era before cable TV took off and an age before the hideous scourge of the infomercial drove everything interesting off local television. Sven first popped up on Channel 32 with his endless supply of rubber chickens and sound effects, picking up where the original Svengoolie, Jerry G. Bishop, left off. I'd often go to extreme lengths to get broadcasts of Sven's shows, where favorites like "Beginning of the End", "Attack of the Giant Leeches" and "The Screaming Skull" would be featured. With his top hat, blackened eyes and wild hair, Son of Svengoolie was the very embodiment of that classic example of Americana, the horror movie host.

And now, here was Sven right in front of me in living (?), breathing color. Complete with rubber chicken! What a class act he is. He graciously took all sorts of questions from members of the audience, reliving the ups and downs of his lengthy career. He pulled no punches in describing his feelings about Channel 32, who fired him in 1982. Sven was off the air until 1985, when Channel 25 WCIU picked him up and where he remains to this day. Unfortunately, very, very few of Sven's Channel 32 shows remain in existence. Many TV stations have destroyed or taped over their old horror host programs.

Koz has a natural wit that compares favorably with guys like Johnny Carson or Jay Leno. He could very easily excel in many facets of show biz, but has chosen to remain a local horror host...for 26 incredible years. Does he have any advice for those hoping to become horror hosts themselves? "Don't do it if you're in it for the money, do it because you love it." Simple but effective advice.

Sven also judged a costume contest, which was a lot of fun. There were some pretty amazing outfits, including a very convincing "Predator", a nasty looking "Jason" and the eventual winner, a towering "Grim Reaper" that had to be 12 feet tall if he was an inch. This partially animatronic monstrosity was maybe the most imposing fiend seen at the convention, playing air guitar constantly with his bony claws. The funny antics of Sven made Mort and me forget all about the pomposity of the "Chaos" guys.

This was Mort's first time at a horror-themed convention. I envied him, because your first con is almost always the best. I know I really enjoyed hanging out with my fellow degenerates and loonies and meeting legends like Sid Haig, Michael Berryman and Son of Svengoolie.

Flashback 2006 sounds like a good bet at this point, but it will have to go a long way to beat out the 2005 edition. See you there, humanoids!